I created Wellness. Balanced. with you in mind. It’s a ninety day on-line personal transformation program and right now it’s free. Daily emails, access to a secret Facebook group and private coaching (via email) with me are just a few of the perks.
One participant in the first group called it “Brilliant and transformative.” Another said “You are confirming so much of who I am every day. I am having a love affair with ME!!!”
This is the last in this series of blogs to give you a taste of what we’re doing in Wellness. Balanced. Each week has a different theme and each day addresses ways to enhance various aspects of our daily lives within the context of that theme.
Today’s blog is from BALANCE week and looks at your relationships. The complete graphics and extras aren’t included here – you’ll have to join us to get the full effect. But you’ll get the idea. Each day is short, simple and powerful. Enjoy!
BALANCE Week – Tuesday
Reciprocity. Mutual respect. Partnership. Collaboration. Ingredients required for a balanced relationship.
However, this balance will fluctuate as people and circumstances change. The exercise you did yesterday was a physical example: as you balanced on one leg, did you notice one side was steadier (and therefore easier) than the other? That happens in your relationships too – one side is steadier (and calmer) than the other. It’s usually a reflection of who’s needs appear more urgent.
Balance doesn’t automatically mean equal. It means steady. You and your child can be harmoniously balanced without both contributing the same to the relationship.
Conflict arises when both sides have big needs at the same time. “Big” is a very subjective term. A dirty pair of jeans may seem like the end of the world to your daughter if she had planned on wearing them to school this morning, while you’re worried about missing an important meeting because of a “true” family emergency. Either situation on its own is solvable, probably calmly, because one side is steadier than the other, but when they happen on the same morning, POW!
Unfortunately, when you’re in the heat of it, it’s hard to step back and see that both of you need a lot right now. It doesn’t mean one is right and the other is wrong, it just means you both need a lot right now. Being aware that that is what’s happening is the first step in being able to navigate through it.
Think about the last time a situation quickly took a turn for the worse: whether between you and your significant other; you and a close family member; you and your boss (or employee); you and [name that person here]. Something was causing you significant stress (your need). What about the other person? Did you notice s/he was stressed too? Or did you get more annoyed because you had unmet needs and you perceived the other person as not only not meeting those needs, but perhaps even hindering your ability to get those needs met?
The next time you find yourself in a relationship conflict, ask yourself what you need right now. Ask the other party what she needs right now. These two simple steps may illustrate it’s easier than you think to get all needs met and restore balance in the relationship
The next Wellness. Balanced. launches on Monday, January 1, 2018. Join us! It’s free. It will be even better if you’re in it. Register here. Please share this on your social media platforms – let’s make it a global transformation!